I've been doing some thinking and some research and I'm not so sure Instead Cups are good for AI (artificial insemination). Sure it makes sense that they could only help with ttc but actually, if that's the case then why aren't they FDA approved?
Now, I don't claim to know anything behind FDA stuff. For starters, I'm not American so why would I but if it's a no-brainer, that they are safe to use for the purpose of AI then why has aproval not been granted?
I don't know what might mean it's not good enough to get the official thumbs up but it just doesn't add up. Is using one any better than just doing the necessary last thing at night and staying horizontal?
Whilst we're on this subject, I'm also not sure this syringe method is working out well either because I seem to have an issue with some, erm, well, squirting back out. I'm sorry if that's TMI but if you're reading a surrogacy blog then chances are you know what it will contain so toughen up!
I know all about not placing the syringe too close to cevix or else you'll get splash-back and I'm careful not to. Also I know from health professionals over the years, that my canal is longer than average so this should lessen my chances of leaking but apparently not.
It only takes 1 sperm I know but if you can get a good few million there to race to the finish line then that's obviously much better.
And the alternative of putting the sample straight into the Instead Cup isn't going so well either for me. Just to be awkward and all that. I find that the bottom of the cup gets forced so far up when putting it in, that some can't help but to be pushed over the edges and out. Wastage yet again.
I'm thinking we really should just try something like this:
http://homeconceptionstore.com/components.html
Mainly just the cup with tube part I'm talking about. That way you can be sure the placing of said cup is correct without worry of its precious 'cargo' escaping en route and then you can do the necessary with precision.
Seem a bit too clinical for only our 4th attempt? Hmmmm.
Thursday, 29 July 2010
Monday, 26 July 2010
Down But Not Out
This bust cycle has hit all of us particularly hard it seems. IM even threw a sickie from work which she said is very unlike her but she just couldn't put a brave face on things.
I know I'm certainly feeling downheartened. None of us expected it to work first time or even second time around but there's a feeling of hope with the 3rd. As I said in a previous entry, lots of mutual friends have had luck with the 3rd round and I think we'd all put our energy into it being *the* one for us too.
We timed it perfectly and it just felt, oh I don't know, right, you know? We had lots of special dates between us, it would have been perfect to have been the winning cycle but it just wasn't meant to be for whatever reason.
Now we're at the tipping point, over half-way of our contracted cycles. It's an uncertain place to be if I'm honest. I'm wondering what my IP's are really feeling at this point, if I asked, I'm sure they'd tell me but I'm not sure in this hormonal state that I want to hear what they might say.
I don't want to use this blog to whinge and wallow in pity, that doesn't make for good reading now does it but I need to express how fucking hard this surrogacy stuff is. I was never naive enough to think it'd be a breeze but it messes with every emotion and winds its way into every single day of your life.
I have faith and hope that my wonderful IP's will one day hold a baby of their own and I desperately hope I get to make that happen so we'll pick ourselves up and dust ourselves off and steam onto round 4.
I know I'm certainly feeling downheartened. None of us expected it to work first time or even second time around but there's a feeling of hope with the 3rd. As I said in a previous entry, lots of mutual friends have had luck with the 3rd round and I think we'd all put our energy into it being *the* one for us too.
We timed it perfectly and it just felt, oh I don't know, right, you know? We had lots of special dates between us, it would have been perfect to have been the winning cycle but it just wasn't meant to be for whatever reason.
Now we're at the tipping point, over half-way of our contracted cycles. It's an uncertain place to be if I'm honest. I'm wondering what my IP's are really feeling at this point, if I asked, I'm sure they'd tell me but I'm not sure in this hormonal state that I want to hear what they might say.
I don't want to use this blog to whinge and wallow in pity, that doesn't make for good reading now does it but I need to express how fucking hard this surrogacy stuff is. I was never naive enough to think it'd be a breeze but it messes with every emotion and winds its way into every single day of your life.
I have faith and hope that my wonderful IP's will one day hold a baby of their own and I desperately hope I get to make that happen so we'll pick ourselves up and dust ourselves off and steam onto round 4.
The Rollercoaster Has Stopped
Well for this cycle anyway. AF arrived this morning.
Cycle 1: Length: 27 and LP: 11
Cycle 2: Length: 33 and LP: 10 (very ill so late ovulation)
Cycle 3: Length: 26 and LP: 10
And not only have I got the tail end of 2 coldsores as well as her arrival but I woke up and today have a sore throat and blocked nose. Someone doesn't like me this week do they?
I might look into something to lengthen my LP this coming cycle, what I don't know. It's always been on the shorter end of normal and since I managed to get pregnant, I wasn't ever worried but this situation is entirely different. Maybe I'll approach my GP about it this week. I wonder what their reaction will be to my surrogacy journey and not only that but whether they'll be more eager to help? I know when I was ttc my own children, the standard was to have been trying for 6+ months or more before they'd consider any assistance (even medication) but as this is for someone else...
I think the fact I have had 3 healthy pregnancies will play against me though.
Cycle 1: Length: 27 and LP: 11
Cycle 2: Length: 33 and LP: 10 (very ill so late ovulation)
Cycle 3: Length: 26 and LP: 10
And not only have I got the tail end of 2 coldsores as well as her arrival but I woke up and today have a sore throat and blocked nose. Someone doesn't like me this week do they?
I might look into something to lengthen my LP this coming cycle, what I don't know. It's always been on the shorter end of normal and since I managed to get pregnant, I wasn't ever worried but this situation is entirely different. Maybe I'll approach my GP about it this week. I wonder what their reaction will be to my surrogacy journey and not only that but whether they'll be more eager to help? I know when I was ttc my own children, the standard was to have been trying for 6+ months or more before they'd consider any assistance (even medication) but as this is for someone else...
I think the fact I have had 3 healthy pregnancies will play against me though.
Sunday, 25 July 2010
Gah
I think it's more upsetting to take a test early and get a BFN than to just wait until she arrives on time, being none the wiser as to what was coming and having hope until that moment.
I really need a 12 step programme to wean me off peeing on pregnancy tests. FTR, I've only taken the 2 last night but that was 2 too many.
And I feel really crappy for giving in and showing myself up publically on my blog for the weak-willed saddo I am!
Oh well. If she really is lurking like it appears she is, I can blame this post on hormones. Pity party for one please!
I really need a 12 step programme to wean me off peeing on pregnancy tests. FTR, I've only taken the 2 last night but that was 2 too many.
And I feel really crappy for giving in and showing myself up publically on my blog for the weak-willed saddo I am!
Oh well. If she really is lurking like it appears she is, I can blame this post on hormones. Pity party for one please!
Saturday, 24 July 2010
Just Desserts
Yup, I got mine.
I caved and tested tonight, I'm rubbish I know but hey, be fair, I held out for 9 days which is more than I usually do. By 6 DPO I've usually used up my entire supply of tests.
Anyway, this is what happened, posted this on another board:
Read the first post of that thread and you'll see it's a long-standing problen with FRER tests: http://www.babyandbump.com/pregnancy-tests/265092-faulty-frers-please-aware.html
The poster in there put a picture of her dud test and to save you from having to sign up to see, I'll c+p it. Don't say I'm not good to you! I'll post it in a seperate thread altogether.
Mine wasn't like that as I said in my description but since a) the test wasn't meant to have 3 lines, b) the lines didn't stick around or go all the way down and c) the batch number matched the known faulty batch number, I think it's very safe to say it was faulty.
Arrrrgh. WTF is it about me and surrogacy and suddenly taking all the crappiest tests? What with my evap scare last cycle and now this. It's beyond ridiculous. I have taken every brand (well it certainly felt like it) over the past 11 years and I keep experiencing these firsts with pregnancy tests.
FRER is supposed to be THE best test out there. Like hell. This has been known for about 8 months now and they are still out there on sale.
I'm pretty pissed off tonight. As I said though, I got my just desserts for not hanging out. Still, I'd have been much more pissed off if I'd got to period day and taken it and that had happened and I'd seen something pink on the result line.
FTR, I took a Superdrug (generic chemist brand to you non-UK'ers) and it was a glaringly BFN so this cycle is pretty much done and dusted.
I suppose since in the end, my FRER was negative, it was actually correct but not without the heart-stopping, tingly excitement I first felt at seeing something on the test side of the window.
FUCK IT, it's time like these that I wish I drank. :o(
I caved and tested tonight, I'm rubbish I know but hey, be fair, I held out for 9 days which is more than I usually do. By 6 DPO I've usually used up my entire supply of tests.
Anyway, this is what happened, posted this on another board:
'I was searching on the internet after a dodgy result with FRER and I think I've fallen foul to this dodgy batch.
I am only 9DPO but took a test this evening and saw a control line and then on the left, where the test line is, 2 very short pink lines. Like not from top to bottom, but just at the top. I thought I also saw the very left hand sided one go down to the bottom.
I looked again after about 10 minutes and the entire test, apart from the control line, is negative. Nothing there at all.
As a surrogate, on cycle number 3, I was very excited for a split second. Everyone raves about FR and I've never had a dud result before but it only takes one to put you off a brand for life when dealing with this rubbish at such an emotionally charged time.
FYI, the expiry date was: 11/2011 and batch number was: BU9243DC
It was a pack of 2 and the other test was fine, as far as I can recall.'
Read the first post of that thread and you'll see it's a long-standing problen with FRER tests: http://www.babyandbump.com/pregnancy-tests/265092-faulty-frers-please-aware.html
The poster in there put a picture of her dud test and to save you from having to sign up to see, I'll c+p it. Don't say I'm not good to you! I'll post it in a seperate thread altogether.
Mine wasn't like that as I said in my description but since a) the test wasn't meant to have 3 lines, b) the lines didn't stick around or go all the way down and c) the batch number matched the known faulty batch number, I think it's very safe to say it was faulty.
Arrrrgh. WTF is it about me and surrogacy and suddenly taking all the crappiest tests? What with my evap scare last cycle and now this. It's beyond ridiculous. I have taken every brand (well it certainly felt like it) over the past 11 years and I keep experiencing these firsts with pregnancy tests.
FRER is supposed to be THE best test out there. Like hell. This has been known for about 8 months now and they are still out there on sale.
I'm pretty pissed off tonight. As I said though, I got my just desserts for not hanging out. Still, I'd have been much more pissed off if I'd got to period day and taken it and that had happened and I'd seen something pink on the result line.
FTR, I took a Superdrug (generic chemist brand to you non-UK'ers) and it was a glaringly BFN so this cycle is pretty much done and dusted.
I suppose since in the end, my FRER was negative, it was actually correct but not without the heart-stopping, tingly excitement I first felt at seeing something on the test side of the window.
FUCK IT, it's time like these that I wish I drank. :o(
I'm An Addict
My personal challenge to myself, not to test before I'm due, is crumbling. So far, I've held off and infact didn't even give things much thought but since yesterday, I'm desperate. It's crazy.
So, I'm currently 9DPO. Expecting her at 12DPO. I don't have any symptoms but I'm not a believer in analysing anything in the 2WW, I've had every symptom and not been pregnant and that's more crushing than having none and believing this will be another negative cycle.
Thinking ahead to (if we have to do them) next month's insem, it's going to be tricky as IPs are away for a week on holiday. Strangely enough, they booked it ages ago and it's much nearer to where I live than where they are now and so insems would totally be do'able distance wise but they may want a break for a month and so we'll see.
Fingers crossed it won't even be an issue.
So, I'm currently 9DPO. Expecting her at 12DPO. I don't have any symptoms but I'm not a believer in analysing anything in the 2WW, I've had every symptom and not been pregnant and that's more crushing than having none and believing this will be another negative cycle.
Thinking ahead to (if we have to do them) next month's insem, it's going to be tricky as IPs are away for a week on holiday. Strangely enough, they booked it ages ago and it's much nearer to where I live than where they are now and so insems would totally be do'able distance wise but they may want a break for a month and so we'll see.
Fingers crossed it won't even be an issue.
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