Future Thoughts

Feeling a bit lonely and sorry for myself lately, probably not pregnancy related in entirety but I'm sure that's a part of it - darn hormones!

I had the urge to call K & B last night and normally I would of but for some reason I was afraid I would just cry, and whine, and probably cry some more so I didn't and I'm sure they're glad of that. LOL.

It's too hot here, I'm definitely slowing down as my body and the baby grow and the children are on their summer break so I'm doubly as worn out. I definitely feel pregnancy more now than when I had my own 3, amazing how 5 years can make a lot of difference. I especially felt old when I asked on a surrogacy board how old the other surrogate members were and I was not far off being the oldest!

Talking about questions on this particular surrogacy board, there was one asking how many surrogate babies the surrogates had had and if they would have more. I've always said I would do it the once, maybe twice but because it took me so freaking long to achieve this one, I guess my mind had always said I'd be happy if it ever happened and wouldn't tempt fate to try a second time and put myself or my family through the hell of ttc but now I know that I can get pregnant and I have this amazing affirmation that I can, I want to do it again! Also, my husband who had been against me doing it again suddenly a month or so ago said that he would be fine with me doing another journey, so that's thrown me into indecision.

I think I will try again, I only have a certain amount of Clomid I could take now so that would influence trying again and whether I would find IPs interested in someone who takes time to get pregnant but I wouldn't like to discount a 2nd journey as things currently stand.

Ideally, I thought I would like to have a baby for a different couple and then try a sibling project (be that with K & B or the 2nd couple) but that's dependent on a hell of a lot of things that are out of my control so not something I can plan.

I wonder how K & B would feel about me ttc for a different couple, after all, any child would related to their child which must be a strange concept! I guess all in good time, it's something to discuss and consider in the far future - let's get Boo safely baked and into his Daddies arms first!